What DO other people call it?

My husband. God Love Him.

I love him.

However, he is the HORNIEST person I have ever met. Now normally this isn't a problem. I'm a girl that likes her lovin'.

Considering we've barely seen each other awake for the last month because of all the hours Jeff has been putting in..it seems that the only thing I hear from his mouth lately is

"Can we have an appointment tonight?"

It gets a little old. Oh I know you're wondering appointment for what? to have your teeth cleaned, for the plumber to come over, dinner meeting with the financial planner.

In our house "Can we have an appointment tonight?" = NOOKIE

This started a while back...years actually because our then tender eared 11 year old couldn't stand to hear the word SEX let alone referenced in the same sentence as his parents. Now that he's 14, he gets it. NOT SEX god I hope not..but he understands the birds and bees and he knows that is how his sister got here...so he figures that we did it at some point. I mean we didn't go running around "Hey Kyle Dad and I are gonna have SEX tonight ok?" Although we'll do that to him now just to watch him turn green. We are the most disgusting parents ever.

But it started with Kyle and we've found it to be quite functional in our daily discussions. He can say that to me when someone might be listening at work or if he's talking to me while pumping gas...no one has to know "HEY BABE can we have wild monkey sex tonight?" They just hear "appointment" and I can answer "Yes, an appointment is set." and truthfully anyone that might here me hasn't a clue what the appointment is for.

Over time we've gotten more lax about saying it in front of people....and just the other day at Kyle's last basketball game I was leaving early to run an errand and he kissed me goodbye and said "Do we have an appointment tonight?" and I said "Yes, we do." It was as I was walking away that I heard one of our very straight-laced Mom friends say "Oh you 2 have a counseling appointment tonight or something, is there anything I can do?"

So I laughed all the way out the door. Upon getting home I said to Jeff "Lisa assumed our appointment was with a counselor? Do we really scream WE NEED THERAPY that much? Who knew?"

He started laughing and said..."I didn't have the heart to tell her what it really meant so I told her we were fine but we had an appt to wrap presents for Christmas. But I had to fight really hard to say it with a straight face because the whole time all I could think was What do you think Lisa and Bob DO call it."

We laughed so hard.....

So today as I start to relax and realize that I survived another year of my insanity of a life...and how lucky I am to be married to this man...I think I can squeeze him in for an appointment tonight.

Aren't you glad you read THAT?