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"I'm Full of SHIT Mom"

This is the comment that comes from my teenager last night.

"KYLE ERIC- Did you just say SHIT?"

"Yes Mom."

"Uh...oh never mind your 14..you're getting old enough. Just don't make it a habit in front of me or your Dad..and certainly NOT your sister...she's like an echo."


"Why are you full of shit?"

"Well honestly, remember when I was little and you taught me to wipe my own ass?"

"Yes" ::chuckle chuckle::

"Well..I was in the bathroom just now..oh btw don't go in there for about 10 or 15 minutes..something crawled out of my ass..OH OOPS..can I say ASS too? Ok by the look on your face I can seeo no..ok nevermind. Anyway, you always told me when I went poop that I should wipe til the toliet paper was clean because that meant there wasn't any more poop, oh wait SHIT on my ass."

::skaking head in utter failure at my parenting skills::

"O-KAY? and?"

"Well I was in the bathroom and I think I used a whole roll of paper. I mean there was so much shit on my butt cheeks. I was wiping forever. So all I can figure is I'm full of SHIT."

"Kyle....go to your room and stay there while I think of something maternal to say because all I got right now is The Apple doesn't fall far from the tree and that's not exactly a compliment to myself.."

"Ok Mom"



Blogger M said...

cod bless you. I laughed so fucking hard. I love your family so very very much and a half plus a third.

I think I'll reread this just to entertain myself once more.

I only hope Liam & I are this normal (and psycho) when he's Kyle's age.

January 10, 2007 at 1:15 PM  
Blogger Christine Spencer said...

"The Apple doesn't fall far from the tree and that's not exactly a compliment to myself"

That's my favorite part!

January 10, 2007 at 1:55 PM  
Blogger Bethany said...

I can't stop laughing! That's too much.

January 10, 2007 at 7:51 PM  
Blogger velocibadgergirl said...


January 11, 2007 at 10:42 AM  
Blogger That Chick Over There said...


January 11, 2007 at 12:05 PM  

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