NEWSFLASH- My Ass needs it's own ZIPCODE
So today I was feeling mildly cute.
I got this adorable pumpkin colored sweater from Lane Bryant over the weekend to match these tan, pumpkin, chocolate colored subtle plaid pants. Before this sweater I'd been wearing a plain cream blouse with it..and I coveted this sweater all Fall.
Finally in their lovely after Christmas sale...$19.99 for the sweater..it's MINE.
Anyway, as I'm strolling to the ladies room....I see my reflection in our glass cafeteria door.
J. Lo...ain't got NUTTIN' on me baby.
Good Lord of all the body parts....WHEN did my ass get so big?
Has it always been this big?
I mean if I constantly looked at my ass...my neck would eventually freeze in this crazy distorted position so I just wouldn't know if my ass was spreading like the Red Sea would I?
My ass officially needs it's own zip code.
So much for feeling cute on my birthday.
I got this adorable pumpkin colored sweater from Lane Bryant over the weekend to match these tan, pumpkin, chocolate colored subtle plaid pants. Before this sweater I'd been wearing a plain cream blouse with it..and I coveted this sweater all Fall.
Finally in their lovely after Christmas sale...$19.99 for the sweater..it's MINE.
Anyway, as I'm strolling to the ladies room....I see my reflection in our glass cafeteria door.
J. Lo...ain't got NUTTIN' on me baby.
Good Lord of all the body parts....WHEN did my ass get so big?
Has it always been this big?
I mean if I constantly looked at my ass...my neck would eventually freeze in this crazy distorted position so I just wouldn't know if my ass was spreading like the Red Sea would I?
My ass officially needs it's own zip code.
So much for feeling cute on my birthday.
posted by Brown Eyed Girl at
7:41 AM
3 Comments:
*I* think you are cute. And that's all that matters, right?
Happy Birthday!! Assvice: Never look at your ass on your birthday. My ass is so big sometimes I think it's looking at me!
Your ass is hott.
YOU are hott.
You and your ass together are smokin'.
Love,
a person who loves your ass.
PS: Happy Birthday!
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