Welcome to My Life of Organized Chaos Where Crazy Eventually Catches up to you!


Freaky Friday the 13th

Nothing like FRIDAY THE 13th being your last day at your job before you head off into the world of the unknown and unemployment; right?

I know I'll never forget my last day at my job that's for sure. "Yeah, it was Friday the 13th."

This brings on a whole new chapter of my life.

The part where I stop commuting to downtown Chicago every day.
The part where I move into my first house in about 3 months. (Time is going SO quickly)
The part where Jeff possibly lands another promotion this fall and therefore I CAN afford to stay home for a little while longer.

If the third one happens GREAT, if not, then I start another chapter at a new job by the end of this year.

For me, this brings on some unexpected feelings of sadness. Almost 2 years ago when I got put on bedrest with Casey I PRAYED so hard for something to come along so that I could just stay home after her birth. That didn't happen so I was back to work in August. Now nearly 2 years later we're down to a pretty good routine and the money is good. I've gotten used to being a working Mom (with occasional twinges of guilt) but we've survived. Leaving now feels like I couldn't cut it..no matter how much I remind myself I didn't QUIT, they are letting me go.

Now I'm about to stay home...what happens when I go back to work? (OH the horror and guilt of leaving my child then).

Jeez, I'm a freaking nutcase. (This should come as no surprise to those of you that know me.)

For today, I'm just hoping to get through the day without crying too much.

Stay tuned---next week I'm participating in my first FUN MONDAY.

I will also be discussing my sex talk with my son who is 14 (actually closer to 15) and the talk we had the other night was about our THIRD sex discussion since he was 11. I have to work my way slowly up to "Do not stick any of your protruding parts into a girl's inner part, got it?"

Because as the Mother of teenager..if you come with TMI straight out of the gate their ears tend to shrivel up and fall from their heads..and they just don't hear anything else you have to say.

Anyway, next week should be some fun posts, now that I'm closing this Feeling Like I was going to lose my job for over a year and it finally happened but not until after our company changed the severance policy to something so craptacular so now I wish I'd really been laid off last year but AMEN it's over!

Happy Friday the 13th Everyone!


Random Ramblings, Questions, Answers

Ok first I'll answer the questions from Ask Angie.

Rachel Asks

What makes you think you are losing readers? Maybe I'm not "losing" readers..but my comments seem to be way down and they weren't all that "up" to begin with. I don't know it just feels that way recently. I know people get busy and don't catch up all the time...I'm just in a funk I think and having a mini-pity party. Don't mind me.

How different is it for you to raise Casey compared to Kyle?

About 1/2 and 1/2 ya know. For one thing I'm not a first time Mom. So I don't freak out over every fall or question my judgement if she goes to bed without a bath once in a while like I did when Kyle was a toddler. At the same time, every illness seems worse because of her preemie status. Also, the boy vs. girl factor. The two BIGGEST factors....in my opinion? First thing is baby products and all the cool shit out there now they didn't even have 12-14 years ago...just BAFFLES me. I mean when Kyle was born there weren't even baby registries yet..and hence I got FOUR of the exact same mobile for his nursery and had to return them. The second biggest factor...having a husband. I'm not doing it alone. I did it all alone with Kyle. First smile, first tooth, first words, first step..no one was there to share in that joy with me...now I have Jeff. To me, they are each special because with Kyle..it was just the two of us..and I didn't have to share anything with anyone..but I also had no one to share the work. With Casey..I have those "family" memories I never thought I'd have. 2 very different experiences but each incredible in their own right.

Amy W asks
Favorite Disney Princess and why...
Hmmmm..that's a good one. Sleeping Beauty maybe...I mean what better gig than being a princess that is beautiful and SLEEPING (I'd give up my entire kingdom for 6 straight hours of uninterrupted sleep)...only to be woken up with a kiss from a handsome prince. You can't write that kind of stuff..ya know? THAT is a real FAIRY TALE.

Kimberly asks
How wonderful do you think I am?
I think you are FANTABULOUS. I still haven't read through some of your archives..but starting Monday, I'll have plenty of time on my hands to do that. Then I'll think you're extra fabu...just watch.

How do you feel about pickles?
Pickles are a food group in my house. Mostly because hubby, Kyle and I feel the same way about them. Can't LIVE without them. We'll go through those large industrial sized jars in about 10 days because we'd eat them everyday if we had them.

What's your favourite form of chocolate? I like white chocolate but in small doses. I like dark chocolate too..but my favorite form...is chocolate with peanut butter. Although I have been refraining (even with all the Easter candy) because I'm doing Weight Watchers.

So there it is...now my next thing is a cry for help. I have bought some things from ebay and most recently a dollar store for Casey's room. The butterflies I bought at the dollar store are resin. The flowers and turtles are ceramic bisque. Does anyone "crafty" know what type of paints would be best for these materials? Do I need to do a clear coat after I've painted as a "seal"? Can anyone help me out..otherwise I'll have to go to Michael's or Hobby Lobby and I just know...I'll never find anyone as fabulous there to help me as My G-Homie probably was to her customers. (Did I mention I'm going to see her in May..yep. She has a long layover and Casey and I are going to hang out with her at the airport for a few hours---can't wait!)

Here is what I got:

  • Lastly, today is kinda freaky. It is probably my last full day at work and all I 'll think about is whether they'll screw up my severance deposit on April 30th. It keeps hanging over me like a dark cloud with the occasional clap of thunder to remind me it's still a storm.
  • I'm tired and when I get tired and really stressed my eye twitches. It's been twitching consistently since yesterday morning. Today isn't looking any better. The good news is...it's ALMOST over.
  • My daughter can say her last name now..which is quite awesome because it's 3 syllables. She's going to be a talker like her Mom.
  • I had a disturbingly honest conversation with my son about his "sex" life..that I think I'll blog about next week..AFTER I've bleached my brain.
  • I actually got on a scale last night and I'm frightened. It's time to get serious about this.
  • My cable went in and out so much last night I think I saw 30 minutes of LOST. So I'm a bit irritated..I got the gist of the show..but you just know I missed a bunch of stuff.

And that's it..I'm gonna stop now..but if anyone can help me out with that paint question...that would be AWESOME.


*blow blow* IS THIS THING ON? An Interview MeMe

So lately it feels as if I'm losing a few readers...not sure if I'm just not saying anything interesting or what..but if anyone is listening...

This is an interview CPA Mom sent me.

1) What would be your dream career if you could pick anything to do without worrying about making enough money?

My dream career would be a stay at home Mom, part-time writer so whether I made any money or not wouldn't be an issue.

2) Complete this sentence: Happiness is....

A kiss or hug from one of my kids.

3) What is the greatest age difference that you've ever experienced in a relationship? Did it make a difference?

In a serious relationship, 3 1/2 years and yes it did make a little difference because I was 22 and he was almost 26 when we got married. That was my FIRST husband so that shows you how well it worked out for me. In a dating/"casual" relationship about 10 years. I was 20 and he was 30 or 31. I can say this...the sex was WAY better than anything I'd ever had...so it was an eye opener for me and yes..he treated me better than any 20 year old did. I also had a casual (no sex) couple months of dating relationship with a guy when I was 25 and he was 41. He was the youngest 41 I ever knew and again, he knew how to treat a lady.

4) What is your earliest memory?

Being very sick as a child the summer I was 3 1/2 and had kidney problems and was confined to bed and my Dad and I watched the original Charlotte's web on television. I loved it so much I begged him to read the book to me...and he did..the whole summer I was stuck in bed.

5) What is the one thing you cannot live without?

Besides my family...probably coffee, chocolate and then clorox wipes and pretty much in that order.

6) What place outside of the U.S. would you most like to visit? Why?

Ireland. I've just always wanted to go there. I have family from there and I think it would be so educational not to mention relaxing to go and just cruise the countryside. I'd also love to visit Spain anywhere that naps are allowed is a place I want to visit... siesta right? Is that the right word?

7) Who has had the most influence on your life?

I'm sure being a Mom most people would expect me to say my Mom. Actually it's Kyle, my son. He is by far; the single most important person to have the greatest impact on the person I have become. I know that probably sounds odd; I'm 34 he's almost 15 but we've learned a lot together, grew up together. Without him, my life would have turned out VERY different.

So if anyone wants to participate and have some interview questions..you just let me know.

ALSO, I'll open up to the floor now....

Any questions for me...on Ask Angie Wednesday....


When life gives you lemons

Throw them at the first person that REALLY pisses you off.

That's my motto.

I am a naive fool.

Somehow I thought finishing out my last 2 weeks of work would be much easier than it's turned out to be.

It's really hard to be positive, not say anything negative about the company and do your job while under a microscope. It's almost as if they are trying to piss you off to the point where they WANT you to invalidate your severance.

It's not gonna happen here. I need those 4 weeks at 100% severance.

I will eat shit with a spoon and fork if necessary...all while being questioned on my judgement about every piece of work I have done for the last 18 months.

There really is no joy in mudville this week..but I'm working on finishing it out..and moving on.

In a few short months after our move, after baseball is over, after graduation I'll be sitting at the new house with hopefully fonder memories than these last 2 weeks. By then, it won't matter.

Would I love to walk out right now? Bet your ass.
Would that invalidate my severance? Yep.

Why don't I just tell them to Take Their Job and Shove it?

Because in the 16 years I've been working, I've never been unemployed for more than 3 or 4 weeks and even then I was temping somewhere during the downtime. I've never collected unemployment and this is the first time I've ever been "laid off". It's an odd feeling knowing that it wasn't anything YOU did to lose your job. It just happens.

So I will not tell them to shove it. I will continue to show up on time, do my work, answer all the ridiculous questions, make the notes about my work, adhere to my lunch break and my stop time and do it all with a smile.

Sometimes being an adult and having to do the right thing really sucks.