Happiness is...

An unexpected 4 days of training for your husband that puts him one block from your office. Thereby allowing him to have lunch with you EVERY day for FOUR days straight.

I mean who wouldn't want to have lunch with this face everyday.

Jeff,

I am such a lucky woman to have found THE right guy for me when I met you. Everyone says it, yet it took me years to believe it. Every time I look over at you with one of our kids or you look over at me and smile and whisper "I love you" very slow so I can read your lips, I can't believe I ever doubted it.

Thank you for making this such a tolerable week but I'll miss you next week.

Love,

Your Very Grateful Wife.

Kyle lived to see another day

So after the "Can I have friends over when the house is a pit?" and then the big let down from Mom...and the much anticipated "Fine, whatever." from the boy child...I wasn't sure what to expect when I got home last night.

Nothing could have prepared me for what I saw.

Kyle had cleaned his room, he'd picked up the living room to the best of his ability, he'd removed a few things and taken a few things down to the basement I'd been meaning to do, he ran the vacuum, taken out the garbage and dusted the TV and book shelves.

I was amazed but cautious.

"Hey Bubba, thanks for picking up. I really hope you don't think cuz you picked up it's ok to have people over tonight."

"No Mom. I'm sorry if I sounded like a spoiled brat. I know it's your night to watch LOST and I know Dad will be home tonight, which is like a miracle anyway so you guys can watch it together. I didn't think about that when Cassie asked if we could hang out."

"It's fine Bub, just try not to do the fine.whatever to me because that really irritates me."

"I know. I'm sorry. I stirred the meatballs again, they smell REALLY good."

"Yeah, we'll eat in just a few minutes."

"Oh after I hung up with you, I ran up to Walgreens I hope that's ok."

"Sure, are we out of toilet paper or something?"

"No. I wanted to get you this." as he hands me a red envelope, which is clearly a Valentine's Day card.

On the front, lots of flowers and a few butterflies.

The special bond of mother and child
Is written with love on their hearts and souls
And makes them a part of each other forever

Inside a few more flowers and butterflies.

Thank you Mom for being all that you are

Forever giving,
Forever caring,
Forever loving,

But most of all
Forever loved

Happy Valentine's Day Mom

Then my son wrote: (in very less than flattering handwriting)

"Mom, I know I tell you a lot how much I love you but I don't think you really know how much. You always say I made YOU the person you are today. You make me- ME. I'm very lucky to have you and I want you to know I don't know what I would do without you. So just in case I turn into a crab once I start high school and forget to tell you how much I love, never wonder if I still love you cuz I always will. Love, Your Bubba Kyle"

Yep, you guessed it...I had to reread the last 2 lines or so cuz my eyes were full of water.

"Oh honey, thanks."

So when Jeff gets home with a card for me and another envelope and he kind of motions for Kyle to go into the kitchen to sign it and I heard Kyle proudly say "Just sign Casey's name, I got MY own card for Mom."

Even though I got 3 cards yesterday, Kyle's was probably my favorite.

That's Right I suck at this Cool Mother crap

My son calls me just a little while ago...he's home with a "snow day" and had just gotten back from sledding with friends.

He wants to know if he can have people over tonight.

Uh...no.

See we have 4 people living in a 2 bedroom apartment. We don't even have a room for the baby she sleeps in a crib in our room.

4 people in a 5 room apartment = CRAP EVERYWHERE

Throw in a vacation and everyone being sick since then..and you have ONE messy house.

So even though I feel completely justified in saying "No you cannot have a few people over to hang out tonight the house is a pit."

He gets that wounded boy sound in his voice and he's like "Ok fine. Whatever. Fine." and I feel like total crap.

When is it that I get to lay the guilt trips and make people feel bad? Cuz I remember very distinctly my Mother laying them on me in my teenager years and just when I think I can lay them on my son...he's laying them on me. Did I miss my turn? Did I step out of line? Did I miss the day they taught us to lay the guilt trips?

This isn't fair....in just a few months we'll be in the house and the kid can have a normal looking home to "hang" out at..and have friends over...but right now..our itty bitty tiny apartment just doesn't work.

This sucks..I want a do-over.

Flowers, Flowers, Favorites, Favorites A Poll ( I guess)

• So the DH did indeed send me flowers for the big VD.
• Not that I don't appreciate them but anytime this week they are SUPER expensive.
• Why not just send them to me next month on the 8th because it's your favorite number?
• Why spend the ridiculous amount of money they want in order to send them TODAY?
• Why? Because they made me smile and then cry when I saw the amount deducted from our checking account.
  
  Ever the one to try and remain calm, when I met him for lunch I attempted to be very grateful, diplomatic and practical about the whole thing.
  
  NOTICE that I said...attempted.
  
  My first reaction was "Honey they are so overpriced this time of year. You should have only gotten 1/2 a dozen vs. a dozen."
  
  He replies "I did. The girl told me how much a dozen was and I knew you'd kill me."
  
  "Well I got a dozen."
  
  "Well you shouldn't have. How much did they take?"
  
  "$98"
  
  "What??? Oh no."
  
  So he calls the florist, explains what happened when he ordered them and how even though he wanted to send them it doesn't do any good if he gets in trouble with the wife for overspending, etc.
  
  The girl gave him a confirmation number and will credit us back the difference from a dozen to a half dozen, which quite frankly I was surprised they would do it at all.
  
  Anyway, this leads me to my question.
  
  Some women like lilies, some like wildflowers, others like Birds of Paradise. Me, I am a giddy fool for peach roses.
  
  SO what's your favorite flower or even your list of favorite colors?
  
  For me I love (probably in this order):
  
  Peach Roses
  Baby Pink Roses
  White Roses
  Yellow Roses
  Lavender Roses
  Orange Roses
  Bi-Colored Roses
  Red Roses
  
  But I'm also a sucker for bright colored daisies and big pink lilies.
  
  Maybe I'm a romantic mush..but even those $9.99 bouquets from the grocery store with one rose and the rest miscellaneous fillers make me giddy.
  
  I'm a practical person but flowers can still put a smile on my face any day. Especially a day like today when for me it's not such a significant day.

My apologies to my Weekly Blog Watch List

Some time ago CPA Mom (she's adding a pass code soon so go check her out and get hooked like I did before she won't let you read her blog without a retina scan) urged us to read new blogs every week.

I immediately added a "Blog Watch" list to my main page picking 5 people to read for a week and then add to my blog roll if I liked what I read.

I had been ready to read the current members for the week of 2/5 and with vacation and work and getting back to reality, I haven't read anyone but my normal blog roll since I've been back and since it's already Wednesday I'm not going to short change those people. So Sorry....


Fattie 2 Hottie
My Little Corner of Life
Never That Easy
Pickleness
Woulda Shoulda Coulda



So I'm off to start over again on Monday 2/19 and read them for a whole week.

I encourage everyone to spread their wings and read some one you might not know or read a blog "type" (if there is such a thing) that you wouldn't. Just for fun.

Valentine's Day, so what?

I was going to write this tomorrow...and then I decided I didn't want to piss on any one's picnic tomorrow.

Just because I don't really celebrate Valentine's Day...doesn't mean someone might.

See I am a hopeless romantic. I am. I love cards, flowers, candy, little heart shaped frames, stickers, pencils, etc. I love it all.

So it may come as a shock to some of you..but tomorrow holds very little "wow" factor for me.

I'm sure you all want to know why, right?

Valentine's Day of 1995 I got engaged for the first time. (Well he'd asked in January but I got a ring with the whole teddy bear holding a pillow ring attached to it, candy and rose petal proposal on Valentine's Day)

Valentine's Day of 1996 I got married for the first time. On a Wednesday, at city hall, with about a dozen of our immediate family. This was followed by a luncheon my parents paid for. This was then followed by a 2 night stay in downtown Chicago that my husband to be DID NOT WANT and only after mentioning to his secretary on Feb. 12th that he'd be "out" and she pushed for info did he say "I'm getting married" that she collected from his department and got us a gift certificate for a hotel and managed the reservations. Otherwise we would have gone home to business as usual.

Valentine's Day of 1997 my husband did not come home til after midnight. Now it was a Friday and one would think you would come home to spend your FIRST anniversary together but he did not. He thought it would be OK with me if he went out for a few drinks with the last few single guys in his office. I didn't have the energy to remind him that A) not only was he NOT single but B) it was our first anniversary.

7 weeks later a doctor found a tumor behind my ear and this began a 6 week period of doctors and tests and needles. When it was finally decided that I may have cancer and the tumor had to come out..my husband's reaction "I can't talk about this now, what's for dinner?" Finally a surgery on May 17, 1997. My husband left town on May 19th for a trip he could have rescheduled leaving me alone and unable to drive or move my neck all that much.

By July I was better and looking for a job.

2 weeks later I went to help my sister move back to college.

I arrived home a day earlier than he expected me.

I heard a message on the answering machine from his sweetie wondering where he was because "the wife" will be back tomorrow and this is our last night together.

Once I confronted him he confessed there was another girl, that he worked with her but that it was over.

For the next 3 weeks I searched for a job, an apartment and a divorce attorney because although I was convinced we should seek counseling, my husband "Didn't have the time".

After I left him on Aug. 30th 1997 I kept our original home number since it was in my name.

10 days later I got a call from the "girl." She called to apologize for the way I found out but that they were indeed still together and she was pregnant with his child.

The next day I confirmed all this once I confronted his secretary and begged her to be truthful with me. See I had only signed a 6 month lease hoping mine and Kyle's absence from the apartment would just be "too much" for him and we could work it out. Finding out he was having a child with someone else only cemented that this was going to be a much longer lease than I had originally planned.

On Oct. 1, 1997 he finally agreed to ONE counseling session.

This was where he told me he had never loved me, only married me to have an established family because the only men at his company going places seemed to be married with kids and that he saw us as nothing more than the biggest mistake he'd ever made considering he'd insisted on adopting my son, he'd now have a monthly (child support) reminder of what it cost him.

October 13, 1997 I was served divorce papers at my office.

So Valentine's Day1998 I wasn't "technically" married but I wasn't "technically" divorced either. I was separated. My Dad sent me flowers from Kyle to try and cheer me up. It didn't work.

My divorce was final March 25, 1998.

So you see...Valentine's Day although I used to enjoy it, sucks for me.

I try every year to get excited about it again since I'm happily married but it just doesn't work.